


Ruin

by orphan_account



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Tokyo Ghoul, Angst, Blood and Gore, F/M, Fluff, Gift Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-04-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:27:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23563783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: But I don’t wanna say goodbye (goodbye)But baby I don’t wanna lieTo lie, to lie to you[dw20]
Relationships: Kuroo Tetsurou/Reader
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	Ruin

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kaientai](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaientai/gifts).



> Probably the longest one-shot I've ever written 🗿

The amount of hatred Kuroo Tetsurou has for himself goes beyond its limits.

He loathes the life he’s been born into, this curse that has labeled him as a monster to society and those around him. He loathes the uncontrollable hunger that takes over him every night, even though he has since accepted the fact that he’d have to live off of blood and flesh for as long as he lives. He loathes the state of loneliness he’s constantly in and the way he craves warmth from someone, _anyone_ , to fill the void in his heart that has been there for far too long.

He didn’t know what the comfort of a parent felt like until he was found by Nekomata Yasufumi when he was fourteen. The man gave him a home and everything he had ever wanted as a child. Nekomata taught him how to read and write, how to hunt, how to get rid of evidence… how to avoid being killed by the CCG because humans tend to be afraid of the unknown. He spent the rest of his teenage years living under the fear of being killed for simply existing and doing what he needed to survive.

Nekoma has become a home to him. A café by day, a shelter for ghouls by night. Kuroo now has brothers, not by blood, but by bond. Yaku taught him how to care. Sawamura taught him patience. Bokuto taught him how to have fun even in a life clouded by gloom. And most importantly, Nekomata taught him how to accept himself for who he is and the life he has.

He’s a ghoul, damned by society, but it wasn’t his choice to be born as one. He has accepted it.

  


* * *

He was working in the café when he met you for the first time. It was fifteen minutes left until closing time but you were still there, studying at a table in the corner when it started to rain. Judging from the clutter you placed on the table — your phone, your bus card and your pens — he assumed that you didn’t live nearby. 

He heard Bokuto mention you before. The veterinary medicine student who tended to lose track of time whenever she studied. That meant that you usually left when the café began to get less crowded, but with the downpour outside, you’d be stuck here for a while longer.

Kuroo didn’t mind, though. He wasn’t cruel enough to kick you out when it was raining this hard. Plus, you were really cute, and he kind of wanted to get to know you more. 

“Some weather, huh,” you spoke up, looking up from your book. Kuroo chuckled softly as he continued to wipe down the tables. “I’m sorry for, y’know, not leaving earlier. You probably just wanna finish cleaning and get home.”

“I don’t mind,” he replied. “Even if it wasn't raining, I still wouldn’t kick you out.”

You smiled. “Your friend’s tired of me. You know the short one with the light brown hair? He always tells me to go home early and eat a proper dinner instead of drinking tea and eating cookies.”

“You _should_ be eating a proper dinner instead of drinking teas and eating cookies,” Kuroo deadpanned. You laughed, and he found himself greatly enjoying the sound of it. “But that’s Yaku for you. He’s a little motherly.”

“I’ve never seen you around, though,” you said, resting your face in the palm of your hand as you looked up at him. “I’ve only seen Yaku, and uh… the energetic one?”

“Bokuto.” By now Kuroo had already stopped cleaning, choosing to take the seat in front of you instead. “I work the morning shift, so that’s probably why you don’t see me around.”

“My name’s [Y/n].”

He arched an eyebrow. “First name? You like me that much?”

“So what if I do?” you challenged with a small smirk. 

For once, Kuroo felt flustered. Women flirting with him was nothing new, yet when it was coming from you, he felt butterflies in his stomach. He cleared his throat, trying to play it cool. “Tetsurou. Nice to meet you.”

You left the café with his number when it stopped raining. 

  


* * *

After a few calls back and forth, Kuroo finally mustered up the courage to ask you out on a date. He dressed up in the most decent clothes he could find in his closet: a black bomber jacket over a white t-shirt tucked beneath ripped jeans and a pair of worn-out sneakers. He was nervously bouncing on the balls of his feet, clutching the movie tickets in his hand as he waited for you to arrive.

His breath was taken away the moment you stepped out of your best friend’s car. You were dressed in comfortable clothes, an oversized sweater, a pair of leggings and a pair of sneakers that also happened to be the same brand as his. _God, she’s so cute—_

“You ready?” Kuroo asked, handing you a ticket. “It’s a horror movie. Bet you’re chicken.”

“I am _not_ chicken.”

You ended up latching onto his arm for the rest of his movie. He wanted to tease you about it but teasing you meant that you’d let go of his arm and he happened to like having you near him a lot, so he just smiled like a lovestruck idiot until the end of the movie.

You clung on to his arm and stayed in your seat even as people were starting to leave the theater. He wriggled his arm out of your grasp and slung it around your shoulders instead, pulling you closer to him as he grinned at you teasingly. “Thought you said you weren’t chicken.”

You playfully swatted his chest, holding back a smile. “Shut up.”

He didn’t reply. He slowly began to lean in closer and closer until his nose brushed against yours, and he asked, “can I kiss you?”

Your hands came up to cup the sides of his face and you brought him down for a kiss he returned with so much fervor that he almost forgot how dangerous it was for him to be getting this close to you.

* * *

Kuroo, Yaku and Bokuto were all sitting in a circle in the living room, a colorful stack of cards piled at the center as Bokuto let out a yell of triumph, putting down a +4 card on the pile. He turned to give Kuroo a mischievous grin, to which Kuroo smirked at in response. He put down another +4 card and was about to poke fun at Yaku for losing, until Yaku spoke up, “you’re hiding something.”

“I don’t have any more power cards, if that’s what you’re implying,” Kuroo replied dryly. 

Yaku sighed, swiftly drawing eight cards out of the stack. “You know what I’m talking about, Kuroo. Your favorite human.”

“Favorite human?” Bokuto echoed, confusion laced in his tone. “You mean [Y/n]?”

“He’s dating her,” Yaku stated. They weren’t even playing the game anymore, even though their cards were in their hands. “Has been for the past few months. I’m impressed Nekomata-san hasn’t found out about it yet. He wouldn’t be very happy with you, Kuroo.”

Suddenly the card game he was playing wasn’t so much fun anymore. 

* * *

Kuroo has found solace in you, but nothing good lasts forever. He learned that the hard way when he was six; he had met a boy named Kenma and was so excited to finally have a friend, only to be consumed by hunger as he ripped his only friend into pieces and fulfilled his appetite in the end.

He doesn’t want to leave you, but he fears what he’ll do if he stays with you for too long. He’s gotten attached but he knows he has to leave because he doesn’t want you to think the entire relationship has been a lie. But he doesn’t want to tell you face-to-face that he’s not who you think he is, that he’s the one responsible for the gruesome murders within the first ward. Humans are afraid of the unknown and so is he. 

He thought back on Yaku’s warning to him, about how Nekomata wouldn’t be happy with him about his relationship with you. Although the elder man is friendly to humans and only scavenges, he’s completely against ghoul-human relationships, as he believes that it’d be the start of a grand problem. He’s the only one in Nekomata to scavenge instead of hunt for live prey. Somehow, the information doesn’t sit well with Kuroo.

This isn’t easy for him at all. Your relationship with him is something he treasures and he hates that he has to throw it away, but he tells himself that it’s for your own good. It’s for your safety. He has plenty of enemies who are ready to get rid of him and the people he loves for hunting in their territory. He can’t bear the thought of another ghoul sinking their teeth into your flesh just to spite him, which is why he has to do this. 

As much as he loves you, he’ll bring nothing but danger to your life. He doesn’t regret falling in love with you one bit. He knew what the risks were and he took them because he loves you, but he’s afraid of what will happen in the future if he stays longer than he already has. He’ll forever remember your kisses, your laugh and the way you look at him like he’s the most perfect man you’ve ever laid your eyes on. If Nekomata taught him how to accept who he was, you taught him to love himself, and for that, he'll forever be grateful to you. 

He glances back at you one last time. You’re fast asleep, being exhausted from work and university, and he doubts that you’ll be waking up any time soon. Hesitantly, he steps forward and presses a chaste kiss to your forehead, freezing in his spot when you groggily mumble something. Then, you’re back to snoring softly, and Kuroo finds himself breathing out a silent sigh of relief.

He gingerly opens your bedroom window, not making a single sound as he stealthily jumps off the ledge and disappears into the night. Leaving your life is going to be unbearable for him, but if it means that you’ll find someone who deserves you more than he does, it’s a sacrifice he’s willing to take.


End file.
